Can I get a witness?

Just to forewarn you, this post is about religion. So... you probably don't want to read it. Also, you don't want to take it too seriously or freak out on me after you read it. It's all my opinion and not fact... in case that wasn't blatantly obvious. Ok, thanks.

It's not that I have anything against religion. Actually I think it's a very nice thing as long as you're not psycho about it or a hypocrite about it. Sometimes (not often) I think it would be nice if I had a god or religion I believed in. My issue is that there seem to be a lot of zealots and hypocrites in the group, which of course you will find in any walk of life, but which is also perhaps one of the reasons I avoid religion all together. That's great and all, to be passionate about something, but there's passionate people and then there's blind ignorant sheep. Somehow I always get stuck dealing with the latter.

What the hell do you say to get someone off your back about religion and morality, without offending or alienating them forever?

There's a couple of very religious people I know, (and I won't mention what their religion is, because frankly it could be anything and their words/actions would still bother me. And I also won't mention the countless times I have witnessed astounding hypocrisy and ignorance from them), who insist on bringing up the subject of religion/morality on a daily basis. This isn't a situation I can walk away from, so it's really freaking inconsiderate and inappropriate.

When they asked me, I told them straight away that I was agnostic. I even had to explain the definition to them, because they had no idea. I find this is all too common that religious-zealots are completely ignorant of any and all other religions outside of their own herd of mindless sheep. It kind of amazes me that the people I meet who are most anti-religion are also the most well-read and self-educated about the many different religions in our world.

These people ask me about my personal life and then judge me on the morality of the decisions I make in my life.

I was most offended recently when they were, in casual conversation, asking me about my relationship with Corey. When I mentioned we were moving in together, they were appalled and even said they were "disappointed" in me because their religion tells them it's a sin to live under the same roof with someone before marriage. They said I would be living in sin until we were finally married.

First off, welcome to the 20th century, folks. Lots of people, devout or not, have SEX before MARRIAGE. How about we work on some more difficult issues here, like teen pregnancies and world hunger and animal cruelty and teen suicide and terrorists and serial killers and rapists.

Second, thanks for judging me. Next time keep your asshole opinion to yourself. If I'm not mistaken, I thought I read somewhere in that good old book that judgment should be made only by 'God' and you are supposed to stick you nosy ass somewhere else... Yeah I think those were the exact words.

Third, I'M NOT IN YOUR EFFING RELIGION. Why do you think that your rules apply to me when you know damn well that I'm not in your religion? You already KNOW I'm a GODLESS HEATHEN, so why are you still preaching to me? Do you think I'm going to give a shit? Do you think you're gonna say, "Oh my my! That is a sin!" and I'll reply, "You're kidding!?! Thank you for showing me the error of my ways. Oh good heaven above, I have been saved at last!"

Anyway, I'm just venting. Let's not make this a big deal, ok?