Links and blog networking junk.

It's been a little while since I've looked at my super-filled sidebar and updated my links.

So I did today. Yay! Ch-ch-check 'em out!

Also, I was looking online and on Blogger for a 'webring' of sorts. Okay, so that is the old school word for it. But basically I wanna join a kind of "blogging network" because those things make you feel cool. Like a blog-club or some junk. I searched for a vegetarian blog network, but no luck. Then I searched for a Midwestern network. No dice.

What the hell, dude? Am I bad at searching, or are there just not enough networks to join out there?

So, I was thinking maybe I should start my OWN damn network and then people will be all like, "Oh Jen Jen Jen! Can I join your Super Cool Fun Bloggers Blogging in Their Blogs Club?!"

And I will be all like, "Well... I guess so. But only if you are super, cool, fun, you blog about super cool fun shit, and also if you must promise to be my friend forever and ever."

And they'll be all like, "Oh yeah? That sounds worth it."

And I'd be all like, "Okay, sign here... and here. And an initial here. A drop of blood here. First born child here. Aaaaaaaand you're in!"

So anyway, I'm trying to come up with a good theme and/or name for the blog network before I make a new blog and start promoting it. And by promoting I mean sitting at my computer staring at the screen waiting for more than 2 people to sign up.

Anyway, maybe if you feel really creative you could help me think of a topic and/or name for this blog network. Leave your idea(s) in the comments section. But don't say "make it a vegetarian network" because then seriously no one would join except for me and Mikala (congrats on your 3 days... let me know if you need any help/encouragement/advice! I know it's really hard. Especially when the beef jerky starts talking to you. It happens, you'll see.) So I just want it to be less exclusive than that.

I want to make buttons too. So you can put them on your site when you become a member and totally whore it out for me on your sidebar so that more people will sign up.

Rules at the bar.

Tiffany's rules for proper etiquette at your local bar or restaurant:
(she's a bartender, she knows these things.)

1. do not enter a restaurant and expect a table for 6 or more people without a reservation.

2. do not ask for separate checks for parties of 6 or more. if you are in a smaller party and will require separate checks, make sure to let your server know BEFORE ordering your food.

3. never touch your waitperson. EVER!!!!!

4. i don't care how bad you need a side of mayo or an extra napkin, NEVER walk up to your waitperson and interrupt him/her while they are engaged at another table. EVER. seriously.

5. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails. (this one i agree is just THE POLITE thing to do, but not a stead-fast rule. at least not at my bar.)

6. Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile; do not get the bartender's attention by waving money around, yelling (especially if he/she is talking someone's order or has his/her back to you), slamming your glass on the bar, whistling at, or touching the bartender.

7. Do not make eye contact with the bartender if you do not want a drink.

8. Never, ever tell a bartender he made your drink too strong.

9. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she refuses, she does not like you.

10. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

11. If she buys you a drink, she likes you. or she might just be being polite because you bought her a drink and she's returning the favor. women are mysterious. deal with it.

12. If someone offers to buy you a drink, do not upgrade your liquor preference.

13. After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence.

14. It is only permissible to shout 'woo-hoo!' if you are doing a shot with four or more people.

15. If there is a d.j., you can request a song only once per night. If he doesn't play it within half an hour, do not approach him again. If he does play it, do not approach him again.

16. If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to drink in a bar. Go to the liquor store.

17. Never complain about the quality or brand of a free drink.

18. If you are the bar's sole customer, you are obliged to make small talk with the bartender until he stops acknowledging you. Then you're off the hook. The same goes for him.

19. If you have ever told a bartender, “Hey, it all spends the same,” then you are a cheap ass.

20. Anyone on stage or behind a bar is fifty percent better looking.

21. A bar is a college, not a nursery. If you spill a beer, clean it up. If you break a glass, wait for a staff member to clean it up.

22. Never yell out jukebox selections to someone you don't know.

23. If you think you might be slurring a little, then you are slurring a lot. If you think you are slurring a lot, then you are not speaking English. (THIS IS ME!)

24. Screaming, “Someone buy me a drink!” has never worked. (Ahem!)

25. Never rest your head on a table or bar top. It is the equivalent of voluntarily putting your head on a chopping block.

26. If you're going to hit on a member of the bar staff, make sure you tip well before and after, regardless of her response. (Does the bouncer count?!)

27. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot.”

28. Never ask a bartender “what's good tonight?” They do not fly in the scotch fresh from the coast every morning.

29. If there is a line for drinks, get your goddamn drink and step the hell away from the bar. (Now if only people would follow this advice!!)

30. Never argue your tab at the end of the night. Remember, you're hammered and they’re sober. It's akin to a precocious five-year-old arguing the super-string theory with a physicist. 99.9% of the time you're wrong and either way you're going to come off as a jackass.

31. If you hesitate more than five seconds after the bartender looks at you, you do not deserve a drink. it is extremely rude to stand at the bar looking like you're about to have a stroke from the anxiety of whether you will be waited on next or not, and then not know what you want to order when the bartender gets to you.

32. Never preface a conversation with a bartender with “I know this is going to be a hassle, but . . .”

33. Anyone with three or more drinks in his hands has the right of way. (No one at Eli's understands this concept.)

34. 15% is the new 10%.


Thanks again, Tiffany. Aaaaand I have a couple of my own:

35. If you bring in your purse, wallet, shoes, keys, shirt, etc you are fully responsible for your own crap. If you take off your shoes and leave them under your table or forget your keys at the booth while you go to dance, keep in mind the bar staff is not your personal Lost and Found. If you don't wanna lose it, don't bring it in.

36. If the D.J. is talking over the top of your favorite song while you are dancing, just chill the hell out man!! Don't scream at him to shut up. He can't hear you, but the other people dancing can. It's not the end of the world, and damnit EVERY SONG IS YOUR FAVORITE, DRUNK ASS.

37. Don't make out with strangers at the bar that you frequent on a regular basis, just because you are too drunk to understand what they are saying and want to shut them up. You will regret it. (And more than likely your best friend will have to keep this person from taking you home with him.)

38. If you fall out of your chair more than twice within the same hour, you need to either A. leave the bar, you've had enough or B. go sit in a booth where you (hopefully) will not be able to fall out of your seat. :)

39. Do NOT rest your head on the toilet seat in the restroom in ANY public place, let alone at a bar. If you need to lay your head down, the floor is cleaner. (I swear to god, this one is not about me.)

40. Do not drunkenly tell two girls that are making out in the restroom that "you should not be doing that"... they will immediately be 10-seconds from kicking your ass. In fact, don't try and convey your ideas to anyone for any reason. Keep your drunk dumbass opinions to yourself or risk getting in a bar fight with other drunk dumbasses. (Actually, what I meant was that they were sitting up on the sink while making out, partially blocking both the paper towel area and the second sink. I don't care if they make out, but just do it in a more considerate area.)

Clueless wasn't just a movie.

I'm decided I'd try really hard to write something real today instead of just taggy-posts and photos of puppies. I thought I'd share with you a few of my online dating experiences from the past. If you haven't tried online dating, don't read this because it may keep you from ever trying it. And although I have some pretty bad stories, I have some pretty amazing ones as well. :) As a self-admitted geek girl, I am a good bait in the sea of online-dating. And usually that's the best place to find fellow geeks.

But that doesn't mean I want the freaks too:

• The Vague Guy

This guy messages me after I've been on the site for about a week. His message says only this:
it looks like we have a lot in common, check out my profile. write back if you're interested.

So I go to read his profile, and it reads as follows...

Headline: Looking for girl with common interests.
Interests: I like everything.
Description: I like to have fun.

Seriously, that is all it said. Read it again if you didn't get it. He's looking for a girl with common interests... and he likes everything?! Uhm. Come on buddy, just admit that you are looking for ANY girl. You're not fooling anyone.

And who the hell doesn't like having fun? When people say they like to have fun in their profiles, my reply is usually "I don't like fun, sorry. It would never work out."

• The Superficial Serial Killer

Okay, so this guy messages me and actually sounds like he owns and fully operates a Personality. However, this isn't always a good thing.

Chat with him went something like this:

Me, casually: so, what are you into?
Superficial Serial Killer Guy, replies: well [insert normal interests here]... and I also am really into serial murders.
Me, confused: what do you mean by that? (thinking: Am I on Candid Camera?!)
Superficial Serial Killer Guy, appearing to be quite serious: i chose to do this paper in grade school about serial killers and ever since then i have been doing a ton of research on various cases. i even correspond with a few prisoners on a regular basis that are currently awaiting sentencing. it's really interesting to hear their side of the story.

Uhm... their side of the story? Ya know what...
There usually isn't any other side to hear but theirs, since THE OTHER SIDE IS DEAD.

Well, besides this he seems... normal. I guess. I decide (stupidly) to ignore this "unique and quirky" interest and try and get to know him better before judging him. (FOOL!) I haven't told him anything personal about me and he can't kill me over yahoo messenger (though I'm sure they're working on this technology), so I feel pretty safe just talking to him more.

However, this finishes it:

Superficial Serial Killer Guy: You've seen my photo, do you have a photo to share?
Me, still ignoring the killer thing: Sure thing.
[I send a couple photos through yahoo picture chat.]
[He looks at photos.]
Superficial Serial Killer Guy: Well, you're not ugly.

I wish I was making this up.

Me, completely shocked: What?
Superficial Serial Killer Guy: You know, you're not stunning or anything but you're not unnattractive. I'm just being honest.
Me, pretty effing pissed: Uhm. Excuse the hell out of me. It's real nice to hear that I'm "not ugly" and everything, but honesty is not an excuse for being an asshole. There are more tactful ways of saying it, like "you're not my type" or ANYTHING but "well, you're not ugly".
Superficial Serial Killer Guy: Sometimes the truth hurts.
Me, preparing to block him: Well, the truth is that you're a psycho and you can't really afford to be picky.

Blocked! This stunning bitch likes getting the last word.

• The Guy My Friends Scared Away

There was nothing really wrong with this guy, he just got scared off because my friends are INSANE. I can't say that I blame him. I was 18 and had just broken up with a guy who hurt me pretty bad, so all my friends were in Extremely-Protective Mode.

He and I went out to dinner at McFoster's Natural Kind Cafe (he thought it was very cool that I was vegetarian). He was a total gentlemen, we talked a ton and meshed really well, and then he drove me home. We get to my house and we're lingering in the driveway because he's obviously working up the nerve to kiss me goodnight.

A car pulls up in front of my house, and one of my friends (now a former friend, but not because of this) gets out, and it's painfully obvious she only showed up in order to check him out. She made up a really lame excuse on why she stopped by and I glared at her until she left.

Okay, so he and I recovered quickly from that awkward moment, and even laughed it off. However, about 5 minutes later another car pulls up. It's a different friend this time, showing up to check on me with yet another lame excuse. At the point, I am just mortified. These things are not supposed to happen after you pass a certain age, like say, age 12.

And I can tell that this guy is thinking "Uhm okay this chick is too immature/crazy or her friends are... I'm going to end up dating her friends too, like we're in freakin middle school." I'm sure that at any minute he was expecting another of my friends to show up, or worse yet to find my parents hiding in the backseat of his car.

Suffice it to say, he never called me again.
I wouldn't have called me either!

• The Clueless Countryboy

This story is not for the faint of heart. There's some descriptive gore involved. I mean it.

I talked to this guy via email after he messaged me. He was from a really small farming town somewhere in Nebraska. (This was before I learned my lesson about long distance and hadn't yet changed my profile to exclude people outside of Omaha or very nearby.) He seemed nice enough, although quite rough around the edges. His spelling and grammar were atrocious, but I didn't hold it against him. I try really hard not to be a total freaking bitch about spelling and grammar. I make mistakes too... I'm not an English professor or a professional writer or anything even close to that. Sometimes all it takes is that I'm smart enough to use the effing spellcheck.

Anyway, we discuss my vegetarianism in the first couple emails. He's never met a veg*ian and so I tell him a little about why I am one. He seems to understand and is quite accepting. Then, we exchange photos...

He sends me 3-4 different photos of himself, but the last photo is the one he comments... (spelling/punctuation/grammar has been dramatically corrected)...

"Here is me with my latest kill. Check out that beauty."

The photo shows him with a large hunting rifle, standing over the carcass of a freshly killed deer. There is blood everywhere. I can even see what appears to be the source of most of the blood... there is a large wound directly on the top of the deer's head.

First of all... how the hell do you shoot a deer directly on the TOP of its head? Was he high up above it on a hill or ridge and shot down? Or did he shoot the deer in the head after the initial kill in order to make the photograph MORE MANLY. "Ugh ugh kill kill, ugh me shoot in head."

Anyway, second of all... we had literally just finished talking my being a long-time vegetarian and that the entire reason was because I LOVE ANIMALS. So, he sent me a photo of him after he'd killed one, expecting me to be impressed?

My email reply to Clueless Countryboy: Uhm, those are good photos, except the last one is kind of scary... Is that real?

Clueless Countryboy's reply to this (writing has been vastly corrected): Scary, huh? Never heard it called that before. Of course it's real, that was my favorite kill too. We had Bambi jerky for a month.

#1. I'm a girl he's trying to impress (or maybe not), and his way of doing that is to show me a blood-filled photo of a cute little completely dead deer he just killed.
#2. I'm a vegetarian and he's bragging not only about killing an animal but also about gobbling it up afterwards. (I guess I would prefer it go to use since he's already killed it, but... that's really not the point at all.)

Uhm, okay, so he's a little... slow. Nothing wrong with that, right? Okay, we're talking slower than Forest Gump here, people. We're talking dropped-multiple-times-as-a-baby slow, I think. I didn't bother explaining again to him the reasons why I was horrified/disgusted. I told him that I wasn't interested in talking with him anymore because of the distance and completely different interests/beliefs/etc. Which is entirely the truth, because I am interested in mellow acoustic folk music, Nintendo, and playing with my dog Molly... and he's interested in shooting at living things and smearing their blood on his face while he beats his chest like an ape.

So I don't think it would have worked out.

Another reminder that I don't do anything.

My 5th tag.

Taggy-thing from Tiffany.

You're supposed to bold the things that you have done... check it out: I have done 39 out of 150. Which is slightly more than I thought I would have marked off on this list. Yay, I surprise myself.

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink ... I would but I'm usually broke by the time I get drunk enough to want to do this.
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain ... not technically, unless you count a car ride up a mountain.
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise ... just once, after my Junior prom.
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game (and survived the crush afterwards) ... I don't even know what this means.
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables ... used to grow tomatos and parsley.
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars ... my house is underneath the stars though.
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne ... It was nasty-ass pink champagne too. And I have done this TWICE. Apparently I didn't learn the first time.
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster ... just recently.
35. Hit a home run ... does kickball count?! Cuz I rocked the kickball at recess!
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking ... I have to be drinking a lot to do this though.
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends ... I still do.
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country ... how about "danced with a stranger FROM a foreign country". Or Walleye.
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign ... not a sign, but an orange construction cone.
46. Backpacked in Europe.
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero ... when I was little. Not recently, unless you count Awesome Girl.
58. Sung karaoke ... On St Patrick's Day after multiple shots, I sang Madonna's "Like a Virgin" with a complete stranger.
59. Lounged around in bed all day ... I have had my fill of this from my surgery recovery crap (well over 2 years ago).
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken ... this can be easy for me. It depends on the guy/situation.
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage ... my worst fear ever.
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark ... no, but I ate squid jerky my uncle brought back from Korea when I was 8 or 9 (pre-vegetarian). It was still perfectly in it's normal squid-shape and everything.
88. Kissed on the first date ... I prefer to if I like the guy.
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently ... took French for 5 years and learned practically nothing.
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking ... every single day.
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart ... it's a part of life.
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol ... yes, fired a hunting rifle or something at targets in Outdoor Education class in 6th grade. It was in this class that I was first reunited with Nadine too! (I did not shoot her.)
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild ... best. mushrooms. ever.
118. Ridden a horse ... once in Outdoor Education class in 6th grade, and again at a friend's farm in 10th grade.
119. Had major surgery ... yay! back surgery!
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours ... I've been really really close.
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about ... only in the sense that some of my friends and family no longer think that I'm completely insane about not eating meat. I'm not sure if that counts.
130. Gone back to school ... after dropping out of highschool and getting a GED (long story), I finally went back to school to get a college degree. Because I was very scared I would be working retail or fast food my whole life without one. Annnnnd my parents made me.
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey ... this was the ONLY book assigned in school that I actually read.
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read ... Maya Angelou
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions ... I haven't done this... YET.
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language ... yeah, customers and/or a few of my coworkers. It's Omaha, this is almost a daily occurance.
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident ... I lightly scraped bumpers with a lady because I didn't yield to her like I should have. It was literally my FIRST DAY driving my new car without an adult at age 16. I was all by myself, driving home from a guitar lesson. She was going straight at the light and I was turning left in front of her. She had the right away, but because she wasn't moving forward at all at first, I (stupidly) assumed she was waiting to turn without her turn-signal or that she had a red light. I started to turn left in front of her, and got most of the way in the lane when she started to go forward towards me. We both stopped completely and I realized that if I didn't finish going left I would be completely in her way anyway. But she was still creeping forward too, and I thought I had enough room to get by her (I have lame depth perception and also I was panicking), but instead I very slowly scraped our bumpers together as I finished my left turn. She got out and was screaming at me in another language and the only words she said in English weren't nice either... I was sobbing after a while of this, and she wouldn't even let me use her cell phone to call my mom. When the officer came to the scene he examined the "damage" to my teeny Ford Escort and to her gianormous SUV (there was some dirt/dust, and completely miniscule scratches) and he asked the lady to just let things go because there was not enough damage to warrant any kind of follow-up at all, but she insisted that I get a ticket for something. That was my one-and-only accident caused by me. Okay, I had to tell that story... moving on...
150. Saved someone’s life ... I helped save my dad's life around March 2006 by promptly calling an ambulance and keeping him from passing out by patting his face and talking to him. He had 2 blood clots that had travelled to his lungs (we found out later), and he could have died if we hadn't reacted so quickly. I only played that small part though, thank god, because the paramedics and firemen arrived within 3-4 minutes of my phone call (although it feels like an excruciatingly long time when someone you love is having an out-of-the-blue, unidentified attack right in front of your eyes). The firemen and paramedics took over from there and did an absolutely excellent job.

jen: i thought maybe i would have to postpone that on you tonight, but our study group is going to be next Monday now

nadine: STUDY GROUP?
nadine: YOU AREN'T IN A STUDY GROUP9:49 AM jen: yeah, he and I are going to go to this new study group on Monday nights.

9:50 AM jen: it's like a reading/discussion/meditating thing, and who knows what else we'll do. it should be fun, I want to check it out at least.

nadine: IM NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS NEW JENNY WHO GETS UP FROM HER COMPUTER CHAIR AND GOES PLACES, WHERE THERE ARE PEOPLE SHE DOESN'T KNOW

jen: I'M NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOUR FACE, NADINE

A surefire crowd pleaser.

I get the feed for The Daily Puppy on my personalized google homepage. It's a site that features a different puppy every day and you can vote 1-11 biscuits on how cute you think it is. Of course, they all end up with between 9 and 11 every single time. Before you get excited, these puppies are not for sale (that I know of) and as far as I know anyone can submit their puppy (although I bet it's tough to get in).

I love puppies and basically everyone else does or should too. Although I made a promise to myself that I'll never own a puppy (I will adopt an older dog and/or mixed-breed instead), they are still damn adorable. I can still look! Here are just a few of my favorites.

So just try not to look at them and make squealing noises. I dare ya.

Apocalypse the Shepherd/Akita/Corgi Mix, passed out cold:
(more photos of Apocalypse here)

Loaf the Mini Dachshund, waiting for a tummy-rub:
(more photos of Loaf here)Wally the Corgi, lounging around:
(more photos of Wally here)

Wyatt the Labrador, trying not to look guilty:
(more photos of Wyatt here)
Tori the Chihuahua, looking kind of insane:
(more photos of Tori here)

Southwell the Beagle, probably running towards lunchtime:
(more photos of Southwell here)
Sylvester the King Charles Cavalier Spaniel:
(more photos of Sylvester here)
Phoebe the Dalmation, looking kinda retarded (in a CUTE way!):
(more photos of Phoebe here)
Marley the Rottweiler, chowing down on some kind of grass/leaves:
(more photos of Marley here)
Olwen the Corgi, looking exhausted:
(more photos of Olwen here)
Mateo the Mini Australian Shepherd:
(more photos of Mateo here)

Henry the Mini-Dachshund:
(more photos of Henry here)

Beethoven (unknown mixed-breed), sleeping on a shoebox or something:
(more photos of Beethoven here)
Marley the Beagle/Hound mix:
(more photos of Marley here)
Luka the Border Collie:
(more photos of Luka here)
Cassidy the Boxer, looking grumpy:
(more photos of Cassidy here)
Charley the Corgi, going as fast as his widdle legs will carry him:
(more photos of Charley here)
Apollo the Great Dane:
(more photos of Apollo here)

Guess what tag #4 means?

Being tagged means I don't have to think of things to say!

Yay!!

Ok, seriously folks, I have been really blank lately in case you can't tell. I need ideas/inspiration I guess. Until then... I'm okay with being passively tagged by Mikala (and whoever else). These questions are pretty cool actually.


1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? Hm. This must be a trick question, because I don't see the "there is no way it can be traced back to you" statement in there. This question is trying to get me in jail for homicide. Thanks a lot. Uhm, okay assuming I wouldn't get caught I would blow up Paris Hilton. Just because I am sick of hearing about her skinny ass, and seeing the high-priced pets she carries around with her like props, while she pretends to be an animal-right activist for 3 seconds. And it also appears that, just like all her friends/boyfriends/movies/money, her dogs are just her playtoys like everything else in her life.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be? Oh god, there are so many to choose from. I guess I'd say Yanni, because really, who's gonna miss him?

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? Oh man, another tough one. Okay, I'd really like to punch my high school counselor in the face. That's right, I said it. She was a total bee-yotch.

4. What is your favorite cheese? Brie!

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make? Uhm, wow, all ingredients huh? Okay, well I'm not good at making up something original, so I want a Gourmet Veggie Club from Jimmie John's. Double provolone cheese, avocado spread, cucumbers, sprouts, lettuce, tomato, and mayo. FREAKIN YUM.

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice? Jake Gyllenhaal. Hell yes.

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick? Omg, I have a list and everything. I will go with Raine Maida, Gavin Rossdale, Chris Carrabba, Daniel Johns, Adam Levine, Billy Joe Armstrong, Chris Cornell, Dave Navarro, Jack Johnson, Bryce Avary, Maynard James Keenan, Eddie Vedder, Rivers Cuomo, Conor Oberst, and I would temporarily become bisexual for Ani DiFranco. I know the question says pick one, but SERIOUSLY I CANNOT PICK ONE.

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy cow, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it? Okay, actually if I slept with all those it would be 16 people in a row... But hey, who's counting? Well, I think I should buy some kind of non-slut potion or 'STD-B-GONE' because DAMN I JUST SLEPT WITH 16 PEOPLE. Actually, I'd use the hundred to buy more clothes.

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Wow, I guess I'd go to Japan since the ride is totally free. I hope there was a return flight with this ticket. Anyway, they have an awesome, completely unique culture and they are home to Nintendo, Hello Kitty, and anime that doesn't suck!

10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do? Buy some sweet Japanese clothes and a bonsai tree, a pair of Japanese Geta shoes because they are insane, a cup of sake or two, and also a ton of souveniers for friends.

11. A demon rises out of Hell and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…? Oh Demon from Hell, I love you...thanks for bringing me Cap'n Morgan for my rum-and-coke. Demons are so nice... Oh, you want my soul? Yeah okay, pour me a drink first though.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there? Ruuuufus!! Okay, I would totally go to the 60's or 70's and hang out with hippies. Hippies are funny. I'd hate to go too far back, because seriously, I don't wanna show up in a time when toilet paper didn't exist or something. No pine cones for me, thank you very much.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? No eating animals. If you don't like it, you don't have to live there.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise? "Dahhhrrrr: the Jenny and Nadine Show", wherein we hire someone to follow us around with a camera 24/7, and I will edit the hilarious parts together to make a weekly half-hour show. You would watch it, trust me.

15. What is your favorite curse word? Hell.

16. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything; they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do? Uhm seriously WTF... I would scream bloody murder.

17. Your house is on fire! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item? My computer, which has all my photos and most of my LIFE in it.

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. What do you do? Eat loads of ice cream, come up with a cure for all known diseases in order to become an instant legend, and say goodbye to my family and friends. It's a really busy half hour.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be? I knew that vegetables would one day make me a superhero. I just knew it. I choose the power to become invisible whenever I choose.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? The half-hour after my dad gave me my dog Daisy when I was 4 years old.

21. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? Well, I'd say my entire highschool experience.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool stuff… you can move to anywhere else in the world! What country are you going to live in now? Crap. I knew Jake Gyllenhaal would open his big fat mouth. Damn him for spreading completely true rumors. Ok, I'd move to Vancouver, Canada.

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be? Eli's!!! But wait, if I've been kicked out of the US, how can I go there? This question needs to go before the last one. You taggy-post writers sure don't think very hard about these things.

24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question…. If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like “Dude, check it out… I can FLOAT!” Nadine's house!!! She would be the most excited too. She would be all like, "DUDE!!" and then try and see if she could do it too.

25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life? Martin Luther King Jr, because seriously he never even got to finish doing all the good things that he was going to do. I am all about the non-violent crap (despite obvious tendencies towards clawing people with my nails for revenge).

26. The Gates of Hell have opened, and Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? My Grandpa, my mom's dad.

27. What’s your theme song? Wow, super hard question. I could literally come up with an entire soundtrack. It used to be "Done Wrong" by Ani DiFranco, when I was younger and pretty angsty. It's still my #1 favorite song, but not necessarily my theme song. I guess right now I would choose "32 Flavors" by Ani DiFranco or "Not a Pretty Girl" by Ani DiFranco.Yeah I worship Ani, she writes/sings what I think.

28. Who do you tag? Whoever doesn't wanna make a real post like me. :)